Does my cat
actually love me?
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Many people think cats never really bond with us. In 2016, a British documentary even worked it out: dogs love their owners five times more than cats. Yet other scientists found your cat may see you much like a baby sees its mom. So does my cat love me or not? Let's walk through three experiments, one at a time. The first is that documentary. Ten cats and ten dogs each played with their owner for ten minutes. A little saliva was taken before and after.
They measured one thing in it: a hormone that rises when you hug someone you love. Dogs went up by more than half. Cats, just over a tenth. That's where five times came from. But the test was done in a strange lab. A dog is fine anywhere its owner goes. A cat in a new place is busy being nervous.
The scientist who ran it said so himself: the place wasn't fair to cats. Only twenty animals, and never a formal paper. So it caught a shy cat, not a cat that doesn't love you. The second experiment, in 2019. American scientists borrowed an old test made for babies.
An owner sits with the cat in a new room for two minutes. Then walks out, and comes back two minutes later. What matters is the moment they come back. Some cats walk over and rub against them. They settle down and go back to exploring. Their owner is their safe base. Other cats cling and won't let go. Or they keep away and never settle.
Of seventy kittens, about two in three treated their owner as a safe base. Adult cats, the same. Human babies who take the same test: about two in three as well. The third experiment gave cats four things to choose from: tasty food, toys, interesting smells, and a person to play with them.
Half the cats wanted the person most. Food won for fewer than four in ten. So why do cats look so cool? Because they say love in cat language. Japanese scientists found that when an owner calls from another room, the cat knows the voice, but mostly just turns its ears and stays put.
Its words are quieter: walking up with its tail held high, rubbing its head on you. And one more: a slow blink. British scientists had owners slow-blink at their cats first. The cats more often slow-blinked back. The researchers say it's a bit like a cat's smile. These studies are small, and every cat is different. But most cats do love you, they just say it very quietly.
Try it tonight: look at your cat, narrow your eyes, and blink slowly. Did it blink back? Come back and tell me.
Where “dogs love you
five times more” came from
In 2016, a British documentary ran a small test: ten cats and ten dogs each played with their owner for ten minutes, with a little saliva taken before and after.
They measured a “bonding hormone” — the one that rises when you hug someone you love. Dogs went up by more than half. Cats, just over a tenth.
That’s where “five times” came from.
In a strange room,
a cat is busy being nervous
The test was done in an unfamiliar lab. A dog is fine anywhere its owner goes; a cat in a new place stays on guard first.
The scientist who ran it said so himself: the place wasn’t fair to cats. Only twenty animals, and never a formal paper.
It caught a shy cat,
not a cat that doesn’t love you.
Leave for two minutes,
then come back
In 2019, American scientists borrowed an old test made for babies:
Some cats walk over, rub against them, settle down and go back to exploring — their owner is their safe base. Others cling and won’t let go, or keep away and never settle.
Of seventy kittens, about two in three treated their owner as a safe base. Adult cats, the same.
Human babies who take the same test: about two in three as well.
Four choices,
half the cats picked a person
Scientists let cats choose between four things: tasty food, toys, interesting smells, and a person to play with them.
Half the cats wanted the person most. Food won for fewer than four in ten.
They say love
in cat language
Japanese scientists found that when an owner calls from another room, the cat knows the voice — but mostly just turns its ears and stays put. Its “words” are quieter:
British scientists had owners slow-blink at their cats first, and the cats more often slow-blinked back. As for why it meows at you, we covered that in another episode.
Small studies,
and every cat is different
Each study had only a few dozen to about a hundred cats. Another study used a different test and didn’t see the “safe base” pattern — though its authors said that doesn’t mean cats don’t love their owners.
Most cats do love you.
They just say it very quietly.
look at your cat and blink slowly
Quick check
In the documentary, cats' bonding hormone rose only about 12%. What does that most likely show?
The lab was a strange room, and cats stay on guard first. In a leave-and-return test, two in three cats saw their owner as a safe base.
